Of Clowns and Cameras
by pixxistixx4me
Summary: Rated for two curse words and extreme embarassment. Jareth has a run-in with Sarah in an oubliette and conveniently forgot his choice of clothing...


Of Clowns and Cameras

"Oh shit!!! I'm *late*!!!" Jareth yelled, accidentally stabbing himself in the eye with his mascara wand. He glanced hurriedly over at the crystal ball perched precariously on top of a metal tube of makeup brushes. In his haste, he had forgotten that he was still wearing his dress-up makeup from his stint as a birthday party clown wished for by an irritating eight-year old that he had desperately wanted to throttle.  
  
Stifling a curse, he disappeared in a poof of glitter, his clown makeup still on, to go confront Sarah in the oubliette she had fallen into. In another dramatic entrance with a liberal amount of glitter, he appeared behind Sarah, his breath hot on her neck, hands very close about her waist, though not touching her. He felt her breathing quicken, her muscles tense, and he completely forgot that he had painted his face white with large red circles on his cheeks, a foam rubber nose dominating his face, and large comical lips painted in red and lined with black, and over-exaggerated greens and blues over his eyes, as well as the large curly rainbow wig perched precariously on tip of his unruly blonde hair. How he managed to forget that he was wearing a large white suit with balloons and green giraffes and large squeaky red shoes is beyond most mortal comprehension.   
  
"What do you think of my Labyrinth, little one..?" he breathed, his words little more then a whisper in her ear. His words seemed to break the spell she had put upon herself in the shock of his initial entrance.  
  
"You!" she hissed, whirling away from him. Her eyes widened in shock.  
  
"Yes, me. Who did you expect, the Easter Bunny?" he retorted, leaning against the wall in his maddeningly superior way.   
  
Sarah began to smile. Her smile broke into giggles, ill-suppressed behind her hands. Finally, after grappling with herself - and losing- she erupted in a gale of laughter, falling back against the slime-covered wall, and into a heap on the floor.   
  
"What?! What is it? It wasn't *that* funny!" he snapped, moving away from the wall to stand above her, irritated at this obviously unstable mortal who had come to annoy his kingdom into submission.   
  
"Its... its just... your face its..." she stammered through her laughter, tears streaming down her face, unable to form a complete sentence.   
  
"What! What about my face? It's perfectly fi- oh shit...." Understanding dawned on him as he dragged one pale finger across his face and it came away, covered in a mixture of red and white face paint. He raised a trembling hand to his hair, and yep, the curly rainbow wig was still there. He looked down, and the green giraffes grinned maliciously at him from his ruffled shirt, and his giant shoes gave a sadistic squeak as he collapsed back against the wall in shock. He slid down to the floor, almost catatonic in embarrassment.  
  
"By the Underground..." he swore quietly, still in shock. "You don't have any makeup remover on you, do you?"   
  
She stifled her fading giggles, and rifled through her pockets, still snickering.   
  
"You know what this means, don't you?" he asked her quietly.   
  
"What?" she asked, somewhat distracted by her search for the makeup remover pads she *knew* she had somewhere in her pockets.  
  
"I'm going to have to keep you here in the Underground to keep you from telling anyone about this."  
  
Her hands stilled, and she turned slowly towards him, a lingering sparkle in her eyes from her bout of mirth. "Alright. Two conditions though."  
  
"Hm?" he queried when she stopped speaking. He had since removed that hateful wig and those spiteful shoes.  
  
"Toby goes home now."  
  
"Agreed. And?" He had proceeding in taking off his green giraffe-encrusted shirt, not noticing that her momentary silence was due to his lack of clothing above the waist.   
  
She shook herself minutely, shrugging out of her reverie. "I get a picture of this."

Hehehehe…. That was fun to write. Well… o! Here we go… *clears throat*

Disclaimer: I own the giraffe suit, the irritating eight year old, and the red foam nose. But I wish I owned Jareth… he's so adorable. Especially in a clown suit *snicker*

Author's Note: This sprung from discussion on the Marysia boards about what your favorite or least favorite outfit Jareth wore in the movie. Well, that lead to makeup, and my own sick, twisted and sleep-deprived mind led me to write this at about 12:30 AM last night. 


End file.
